Happy Halloween, Kiwi Style!

I have to start out with a confession:  I have become a bit of a Halloween "Scrooge" over the past several years.  It's happened gradually, but I have grown from really liking Halloween, to merely tolerating it, to now almost dreading the day.  I know there are probably some of you Halloween-lovers out there who may not want to even finish reading this post…but stick with me!  My tune has changed, and I will try to explain.

Looking back, I absolutely LOVED Halloween as a kid…I mean, what kid doesn't love Halloween?  School parties, costumes, and tons of candy = pure heaven.  I think Halloween started to lose its magic in my late teens.  When you are too old to trick-or-treat, you don't party, and you don't feel like joining the hordes of women who think that Halloween gives them a free pass to squeeze into some naughty, revealing "costume", you feel somewhat displaced.

Beyond that, I disliked how truly scary and macabre and sinister Halloween had gotten.  I remember going into one of those seasonal Halloween super-stores, and was honestly horrified by the level of grossness and scariness I beheld (not to mention the trashiness).  I couldn't believe what was being sold at a store that did not have an age restriction for entrance!  :)   

Despite my negative feelings, after becoming a mom I decided that I would try really hard to love Halloween, for my kids' sake.  We've always made sure the kids had cute costumes (although usually store-bought and not very creative).  We've put up a few decorations every year.  We've carved pumpkins, and, of course, we've NEVER skipped the trick-or-treating.

Even so, it's still been pretty dreadful for me.  I haven't dressed up in years, beyond wearing black and orange (and if I'm feeling particularly festive, I might throw on a witch's hat).  I have come to view Halloween as the somewhat bothersome stepping stone on the path to two of my favorite holidays, Thanksgiving and Christmas.

When October commenced here in New Zealand, we knew right away that there wouldn't be as much of an emphasis on Halloween as you see in the States.  Case in point:  This pic is of the entire Halloween section at our grocery store:

At another store, they also carried a few decorations and had big bags of candy for sale.  I had to double-take when I saw this Reese's display:

I guess that Reese's are still somewhat of a novelty here, but the price just shocked me!  A 50-piece bag at home would be…what… four or five dollars?  When I went to Utah for the funeral, I snapped a quick pic of just a portion of the Halloween candy and supplies on display at Walmart (not that I'm endorsing this type of excess…it's a little nuts):

Anyway, when we realized that Halloween wasn't very widely celebrated in New Zealand, I was actually a bit relieved.  Maybe this was my chance to get a break from it all!  Hooray!

I should have known better.

When you have older kids (namely Julia) who love every holiday, they can't imagine the thought of eliminating something as monumental as Halloween (the horror!).  So, in the weeks leading up to October 31st, when she recognized that Halloween wasn't getting the commercial attention she is accustomed to (and when she noticed my lackluster attitude about it all), Julia took matters into her own hands.

Pretty soon, we discovered homemade decorations popping up all over the house, like jack-o-lanterns and bats made from construction paper (which were taped to the windows), and these festive candle holders made from empty milk cartons:

Even though they don't sell the traditional big orange pumpkins, I bought a few small pumpkins, which were eagerly transformed into mini jack-o-lanterns:

Before long, the twins were asking me to make "pumpkins" out of everything!

When we came home from our Spring Break trip, we were delighted to discover that we had received a package from home!!  Aunt Danielle and Grandma Marylin had sent a goody box with lots of fun Fall/Halloween treasures.  It was so thoughtful of them, and we all squealed with delight at the contents of the package.  I must have mentioned to them that I would miss making pumpkin pies this season.  I never imagined that I would be so happy to see canned pumpkin, and pumpkin pie spice, too!  There will be pies, people.

Have you ever witnessed children crying literal tears of joy over a bag of candy corn?  I have.

A few days later, as a means of entertaining the twins, someone did a youtube search for "toddler halloween" videos.  Little did we know that a true obsession was being born.  We have watched dozens and dozens of video clips & halloween jingles.  Even now, a few weeks after Halloween, my twins are still asking every day to see "pumpkins on com-poo-ter!" 

All things Halloween gradually began to saturate our lives.  That being understood, this exchange is not surprising:

Me:  (to Luke)  It's so exciting that in just a few weeks, you and Landon are going to be SUNBEAMS at church.

Landon:  (running in from the other room, terror-stricken)  No, Mom!  That's too scary!  I can't… be… a ZOMBIE!!

I'm not even joking when I say that I could probably recite "Five Little Pumpkins" backwards by now.  Our trips to the library have yielded stacks of Halloween-related storybooks.  We bought the "Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown" movie for our Apple TV, and the twins have watched it at least eleventy times.  Here's Landon reciting his favorite part of the show:

Good grief!  I suppose it's what I deserve for trying to stifle the Halloween spirit around here.  Luke and Landon are way more interested in Halloween than any of the other kids were at their age!   

We had talked about buying costumes for the kids, but decided against it since they were expensive and we didn't love anything that was available.  We already had super-hero outfits for the twins, so we thought we'd just come up with something else for the others.  As it turned out, I was in Utah the whole last week before Halloween, and actually returned on Halloween day, in the early afternoon.  I was so very, very exhausted, and just wanted to go to my bed and sleep through it all, but I put on my happy-face mask (that was my costume this year) and went along with the celebrations.

We weren't sure if we would get any trick-or-treaters, or if anyone around here would even serve candy, but we decided to give it a go.  Luke put on his Incredible Hulk costume (he didn't want to wear the mask because he thought it made him look "too scary"):

He's using his winter beanie for a candy-collection bag (yep, we're ghetto like that).

Landon refused to wear his Spiderman costume, but instead insisted on wearing the "Great Pumpkin" shirt I had brought for him from Utah.

Since Emily has a complete aversion to traditional costumes -- she has serious issues with scratchy or restricting fabrics -- she was perfectly content to wear her jack-o-lantern shirt:

I have no idea what Cameron is going for here, but when you leave a kid to his own costume-designing devices, you never know what he'll come up with!

Rachel and Julia put on the only things they could think of that might slightly resemble costumes:

I'm stunned that anyone would give candy to this rag-tag bunch of misfits… but a few people actually did!

(I'm sensing a little reluctancy from this lady):

It's a tradition that we trick-or-treat at our house last:

We probably got fifteen trick-or-treaters total (not including our bunch).  Here's the grand total of candy collected by my kids.

Once it got darkish, we turned off our porch light, and the party REALLY started. :) We moved to the back patio, and took turns bobbing for apples…

… followed by the ol' "donut on a string" challenge:

After putting the littles to bed, the rest of us stayed up to watch a movie called "The Prestige"…well, they watched it.  I fell asleep about 36 seconds after sitting down on the couch.

Since we are a day ahead of our loved ones and friends in the States, I spent the next day coming out of my travel coma while thoroughly enjoying all of the fun Halloween posts on social media.  As I acknowledged my joyful feelings whilst scrolling through photos of minions and ninjas and carved pumpkins and Duck Dynasty characters, I realized that I was experiencing a true Halloween miracle!  Even though we had had a really fun night as a family, I recognized how much I truly missed our traditional Halloween celebrations from home.

I have resolved to focus on the super fun aspects of Halloween in the future…the joy of the kids, the pumpkins, the decorations, the trick-or-treating, the creative costumes…instead of being irritated by the dark or less-wholesome aspects.  Heck, I think I might actually dress up next year, in an honest-to-goodness costume.  Steve has even agreed to do a couples costume with me (I have no idea what that will be yet, but if you know Steve, that's true love right there…and I can confirm that it definitely WON'T be doctor and naughty nurse, ha ha).  

Now, if you'll excuse me -- I've just been informed that those Five Little Pumpkins are up on that gate again, and they ain't gonna roll out of sight by themselves.           

One Man's Trailer is Another Man's Treasure

During our Spring Break trip, it became painfully obvious that we would not be able to take another long road trip without some sort of extra storage space.  Big Red was so filled to the brim that we looked like complete hoarders…piles of stuff stacked on empty seats, having to climb over bags and supplies every time we stopped, etc.  It was a little embarrassing.  Since we are planning a big trip to the South Island with Steve's parents in January, and have plans for other travels with more family and friends next year, we knew there was absolutely no way we could take extra people plus extra stuff in just our van.  We looked into renting a trailer ($50/day), which, when you are looking at an extended trip, really adds up!  Brand new trailers were going for a few thousand dollars…out of the question. 

So, we were driving home from church on a cloudy day, and the skies opened just enough to let one bright ray of sun shine down on the beauty you see above (cue the chorus of "AHHH"s).  The trailer was parked in an empty lot... with a "For Sale" sign attached!  We immediately called, negotiated with the owner on the price (settled on $350), and Steve picked up the trailer the next day! 

It's obviously not in perfect condition…we need to configure some new clasps, and we'll have to work on waterproofing it a bit (or at least waterproofing the stuff we pack inside), but we love it!

Don't you agree that this baby is going to look awesome attached to Big Red? :)  

Julia's 13th Birthday

It's happened again.  Just like that.  One of my children has become a teenager!  All things considered, it really couldn't have happened to a better kid.  Julia is amazing, and it's been a pleasure to celebrate her special day (even if said celebrations have been a bit fragmented). 

There is nothing pleasurable, however, about getting really sad news on your birthday.  Julia loved her Grandpa Steve.  She had been speaking of him often during the few days since hearing of his sudden illness, and had tenderly mentioned him in our family prayer just a few hours before we received the news that he had passed away.  As I tossed and turned in those early-morning hours, I dreaded greeting Julia on her special day with such heartbreaking news, but it was unavoidable.  I wished her a "Happy Birthday" but she could see the strain on my face.  I softly told her that I'd had a call from Grandma in the middle of the night.  She knew right away what that meant, said "Oh no!" and hugged me tight.

After making the decision to leave for Utah that very afternoon, I was more than happy to allow Julia to stay home from school.  She helped me with laundry and played with Luke and Landon while I frantically tried to prepare to leave.  I apologized to her many times about the unfortunate timing of everything, but she sincerely comforted me and gave me so many hugs, reassuring me that she was just fine.  I was proud of her and touched that she was being so thoughtful and mature under the circumstances. 

Steve came home from work a little early so we could all be together with Julia before I left for the airport.  I'm so glad that we had decorated a little bit and had wrapped Julia's gifts the night before!  Besides the sign and balloons, Rachel had snuck into Julia's bedroom and had taped these cute messages on the wall for Julia to see first thing on her birthday:

What a thoughtful thing to do!  Julia loved these notes (and others) from Rachel.

The first gift that Julia opened from us was sort of silly, but also sentimental…the two-disc DVD set of "Balto" movies that she and Rachel absolutely loved as little girls.  

Thirteen is the age in our family when one receives a cell phone (of the very basic variety).  Since we didn't want to spend money on a New Zealand cell phone that would need to be replaced in a few months, we bought Julia a calculator with a coupon (good for a Utah cell phone) attached to the back.  Why on earth would we present the coupon on a calculator, you may ask?  When Rachel turned 13, she opened her new cell phone excitedly, and my dear sweet Mom, from across the room, brightly exclaimed, "Awww… a CALCULATOR!"  We laughed our heads off at that, and it's become a fun family joke.

Julia's main gift was a ukelele.  We had fun shopping for it here in Palmy, and have enjoyed listening to her strumming and singing.  This next series of photos makes me happy…the twins were so excited to be right there in the action while Julia opened her gifts.

Later that evening, Steve took Julia on a date.

They had a lovely dinner at Chada Thai.  I just have to say that having older kids who enjoy different types of food is really awesome. 

Back at home, everyone sang Happy Birthday to Julia and she opened a few more gifts (ear buds and books).  I had previously bought everything to make Julia's birthday cake, but ran out of time that day, so Steve said he would take care of it.  He later decided to use a box cake mix instead, and I asked him how it turned out.  "Fine," he replied, "although shortly after frosting the cake, I opened the microwave and discovered the melted butter that was supposed to go into the cake batter."  Ha ha.  Oh well, the cake still looks yummy in the picture!

A few nights ago, I took Julia out on a date as well, and we had a great time.  She chose to eat at the Bean Cafe.  It makes me laugh that Julia's hand is highlighting the word "Asian."  I'm probably going to embarrass her by saying this, but Julia is a bit obsessed with all things Asian.  She has said many times that she wants to go on a mission to an Asian country, marry an Asian, and have lots of Asian babies (or at least adopt kids from Asia).  It's cute.

We walked into the cafe, and low and behold, there was a cute Asian family waiting in line…with TWIN babies!  Julia could hardly contain her delight.  That might have been her favorite "birthday" moment of all.

Here are some collage highlights from the dinner.  We had lots of fun and the food was great.

That yummy piece of cake we shared was NOT missing any butter.  :)

If there's anything Julia loves more than Asians, it's holiday decorating.  Last week, she was perusing Trade Me (our local buy/sell website), and found an artificial Christmas tree for sale, begging us to buy it.  Steve and I hadn't even really talked about Christmas decorations yet, but we agreed that even a small tree was a must, so we bought the tree that Julia found.  After our dinner, we went shopping for tree decorations.  

Living in the southern hemisphere is so interesting…I have to say that it's a little strange to see the Christmas displays next to the swimsuits and beach balls and kiddy pools.

Julia is a blast to shop with.  She enjoys trying on lots of things, and is always good for a goofy face or striking a pose.

It is so much fun to be a parent to a smart and darling and funny young lady like Julia.  Teenage-hood looks good on you, sweetie!

Saying Farewell to Grandpa Steve

My sweet mom called in the wee morning hours last Wednesday to let me know that her dear husband Steve Jackson had passed away.  He had started feeling ill only a few days before...what started out as pneumonia rapidly escalated to sepsis.  His extremely high fever, dramatically low blood pressure, and high levels of acidosis were just too much to overcome.  All four of his children were able to be with him during those last hours before he moved on to the other side.  He was 70 years old.

I went back to bed, woke up Steve, and told him the heartbreaking news.  We felt a particular bond with Steve J. since we had played a small part in the events that brought he and my mom together.  We invited Mom to move in with us in Kaysville not long after our daughter Emily was born.  Steve J. lived in our neighborhood and attended our LDS ward.  He had been a widower for a few years.  It didn't take long before people in the congregation started making hints about Mom and Steve, suggesting that they would be a cute couple. :)  After a series of stolen glances and smiles exchanged at church, Steve finally asked my mom on a date.  They dated for a few months and were married on April 14, 2007 in the Bountiful LDS temple.  

After breaking the sad news to my Steve about Steve J.'s passing, I expressed my wishes that I would love to fly home for the funeral services, both to honor Steve J. but also to be there to support my mom.  We both agreed that it would be so nice, but highly unlikely that I would find reasonable airfare at such late notice.  I tried to go back to sleep, but tossed and turned for hours.  I finally got out of bed and began searching for tickets.  To my utter astonishment, the fares were coming up at about half the price of what we had speculated.  I didn't book anything, but anxiously waited for Steve to wake up so I could talk to him about the possibility of traveling to Utah.

We didn't have too much time to talk before Steve left for work, but he called a short while later to tell me that he had spoken with his workmates about the situation.  He already had four of the next seven days off, and was able to rearrange the schedule to get the additional days off.  Once I got the go-ahead from him, I booked a ticket to fly to Utah that very afternoon, departing about 12 hours after the time I first received the news from my mom. 

One unfortunate coincidence was that that day happened to be our sweet daughter Julia's thirteenth birthday.  We had decorated the house and wrapped her gifts the night before, so even though her birthday was met with very sad news, the house still looked festive, and we tried to make her feel special under the circumstances.  She was such a sweetheart about the situation.  She stayed home from school and helped me pack and get ready to leave.  We shared lots of hugs...she knew it was hard for me to leave on her special day.  I am grateful for Steve and Rachel for taking over after I left to make the evening memorable for Julia.  I'll do a separate post about Julia's birthday to follow, but here's just one recent pic of our cute new teenager!

Oh my goodness, I love this girl.  We are both looking forward to our mom-daughter date this weekend. :)

Traveling back to Utah was surreal.  Never would I have predicted TWO solo trips back to the States after our initial arrival in New Zealand.  I'm getting pretty familiar with Air New Zealand, as well as the Palmerston and Auckland and LAX and SLC airports!  Here's a shot from my seat, crossing the Pacific at sunset...this view made me ponder about earth and heaven and love and life.

After nearly 24 hours of travel time, I arrived safely in Utah.  My dad and stepmom Marylin were there to greet me, and had been so kind to get my car out of storage.  They also lent me a local cell phone to use.  They are always eager to help me or make things easier for me.  I love them.

After visiting for a few hours with my mom, I headed to Ray and Danita's (my wonderful in-laws) home, where we lived last year while they were on their mission.  Since Mom's house was pretty full with some of Steve J.'s family members (and since some of our furniture is still being stored at Ray and Danita's), I decided I would stay with the Caldwells, only a few miles away from my mom.  I was exhausted from travel, and it was absolutely lovely to sleep in my own bed again.

I posted on Facebook a few weeks ago that fall in Utah is my favorite time of the year.  Of course I never imagined that I'd be in Utah THIS fall.  The colored leaves were really beautiful.  I wish I had taken more photos, but I did get a few:  

My sisters Jenny and Lydia arrived from Texas and California, which meant that all six of Mom's kids were there to support her.  While the circumstances which brought us together were heartbreaking, we were all grateful to be together, since it had been nearly two years.  

Steve's viewing was very nice and well-attended.  Since my mom and Steve had lived in Steve's home in my old neighborhood, I knew so many of the people who came to pay their respects.  I appreciated that opportunity to see old friends and acquaintances.  It was very tender to hear how much they had grown to love my mom over the past 6 years (most had lived near Steve for decades and already adored him).  Many of my sweet friends looked me in the eyes and told me that they would be there for my mom and would take good care of her.  They made me cry!  I love them all.

I was surprised by a visit from my caring friends Katherine and Brooke from Mountain Green.  I didn't get a picture with them, but treasured their thoughtfulness!  I was also touched to see my wonderful friends since elementary school, Shannon and Amber.  We have been so close for years, and have shared in each other's triumphs and heartaches.  It meant so much to me that they came to hug my mom and to visit with me.    

One more (blurry) photo from the viewing...this pic makes me want to reach through my computer and give Mom another big hug.

When we should have gone home to get a good night's sleep, I went over to my dad's house (where my sisters were staying) and we chatted for a few hours.  After Dad finally headed to bed, I grabbed my keys to leave, but ended up staying for over two more hours!  It was foolish to stay up so late when I was already jet-lagged, but so well worth it.  When sisters don't see each other very often, we have to make up for lost time!

The morning of the funeral dawned clear and beautiful.  My mom mentioned several times that day, "This is Steve's favorite kind of day."  We all learned a lot about Steve's life during the funeral.  We laughed and we cried.  It was touching to see so many people who came to honor Steve and to support my mom.

A few photos at the cemetery:

After the dedicatory prayer, our family took advantage of the beautiful day to take some photos together.  Who knows when this many of us will be together again?  

Left to Right:  Ben, Greg, Mindy, Jenny, Lydia and Clayton.

With Mom:

With Dad, Marylin and Grandma Lorie:

Sisters!  Love them both so much.

The whole Scothern clan... well, some of us... would you believe that there are 21 not pictured?  :)

Steve J.'s got a pretty gorgeous bunch.  I enjoyed getting to know all of them better and hope to keep in touch with them!

I love this photo with Grandma Lorie, who turned 83 on Halloween.  She is so sharp and witty.  Since she is my only living grandparent, I can finally shout from the rooftops, "Grandma, you are my FAVORITE!"

We enjoyed a delicious luncheon provided by the thoughtful ward sisters.  Thanks so much ladies!  

The next few days were spent visiting, relaxing, eating, crying, hugging, and basically just trying to spend as much time with Mom and my family as possible.  Mom had good moments, where she was feeling strong, but also hard moments that sent her reeling...something as simple as seeing tomatoes from the garden that Steve had picked for her caused her to weep.  I know there will be tough moments in the coming days - weeks - months, and I will pray every day that she and Steve's kids will be strengthened and uplifted by each other, their memories, loved ones around them, and especially the love of the Savior and their faith that they will be reunited with Steve again.

During the days after the funeral, we took a few long drives together.  One afternoon, we drove to have a peek at our lot where we'll be building our new home.  Construction is set to begin in the next few weeks.  I'm excited.

After my sisters had gone home, we had a lovely gathering with the Caldwells, filling up on Layne's chili verde and topping off with a batch of chocolate toffee pretzel bark (that stuff I blogged about earlier).  We ate too much of everything (huge shocker) and enjoyed one another's company.  My mom came too.  It was a very nice evening.

The weather turned cold and windy on the morning of my departure.  I love this pic of the Caldwell's backyard with a fresh dusting of snow on the mountains:

The front yard view was not quite as pleasant, as it brought back memories of last fall and the many, many hours we spent raking up leaves!

The return trip home was very long, but went smoothly.  Previously I witnessed sunset on the Pacific, and this time I was treated to a beautiful sunrise.

I had asked my family to give me a wish-list of things they'd like me to bring back from Utah.  Thanks to a big bag lent to me by Danita, I was able to fulfill all of their wishes, plus much more.  The kids were excited about everything, but especially the surprise appearance of our Christmas stockings.  I climbed high into our storage unit... on an unstable ladder... in a DRESS... to retrieve those babies.  It will be so nice to have a little something from home for the holidays.

I am incredibly grateful that I was able to make this trip.  I loved Steve Jackson for making Mom's dreams come true.  He was a hard-working, generous, humble, caring, and kind husband.  I only wish that they had had more years together.  Steve was a wonderful grandpa to my kids and they will miss him very much.  We are all very sad.  One thing that Grandpa was famous for was his love for gummy bears.  I brought back a baggy full from the last big Costco bag that Grandpa had eaten from.  I think it will be strange and more real for my kids when we move back, and Steve isn't at all the activities where they are used to seeing him.  Cameron and Grandpa shared a particularly close bond.  I love this photo of them together from Thanksgiving a few years ago:

  

I am so thankful for our loving and thoughtful work and church friends here in New Zealand, who brought many meals and offered to help Steve while I was gone.  I am mostly grateful for my sweet Steve, who is a superhero in every sense of the word.  It's not easy to manage this crazy household as a team... it's so much harder on your own.  Steve amazes me.  We have the best kids, too, who truly understand the meaning of teamwork and unity in a family. 

Last but not least, a shout-out to Jesse, the carpet cleaning specialist, who painstakingly worked for four hours to transform Landon's nail-polish artwork from this...

...to this:

Phew!!

It's nice to be home.