Ready... Set... ???

When I mentioned the visa paperwork in the last post, I never imagined the drama that awaited us.

We were grateful for the folks at VISTA (the staffing agency in Utah) for getting the paperwork organized and sending us all the correct forms.  That saved us hours of work.  We were told that we could not apply for visas prior to 90 days before Steve was scheduled to begin work in NZ...July 8th.  So, by early April, the paperwork was completed and submitted.  We were advised that the usual waiting time for visa approval was 2-3 weeks.

Well, after three weeks had passed, we had received our visas -- everyone, that is, except Emily.  We weren't too concerned at that point, and figured that because of her Down Syndrome there may be a slight delay.  Since New Zealand has a socialized healthcare system, we recognized that there was the possibility that they might be more cautious about granting visas to individuals who may potentially be costly for the system.

We began to worry in early May, nearly six weeks after we had submitted the first visa documents, when we heard from INZ (Immigration New Zealand) asking for additional information about Emily's health and education history.  We quickly made an appointment with Emily's physician who patiently examined her and filled out the tedious paperwork (13 pages).  Emily's teacher at school drafted a detailed letter summarizing her scholastic progress and achievements.

We heard back fairly quickly that the 13 pages from the pediatrician were not sufficient, so he was asked to write a letter as well.  Once everything was sent in, our contact at VISTA told us that these special-request visas sometimes took 6-8 extra weeks to process.  Because Emily is very healthy, has never been hospitalized, and takes no medication, we felt cautiously optimistic that things would continue to progress as planned.

In the meantime, we had already purchased airfare to NZ, scheduling to depart on June 26th.  We recognized that buying tickets before getting all the visas was a risk (we actually bought tickets even before the additional requests for Emily from INZ), but we found a great deal and decided to pull the trigger.  We dreaded the thought of waiting until the last minute to buy 8 tickets!

May and June were busy and we had so much to do, so we plugged along, expecting to hear any day that Emily's visa was approved.  As our departure date approached, Steve began calling our contact at VISTA (Robin) and the consulate in LA (Brad) at least once a day.  We were also in close contact with Christine, the hospital contact in NZ who had helped us find our home.  Brad was kind to us but admitted that he was powerless in the situation.  He would say things like "I'm hoping to hear something by Friday" and then when nothing came through on Friday, he'd say "We'll hear on Monday."  When we didn't hear a word on Monday (and we were scheduled to leave Wednesday afternoon), we really started to freak out.

Sometime during these hectic days we were notified by Air New Zealand that they had to change our flight schedule (only increasing the total travel time by 10 minutes).  As compensation for our trouble, they would refund us $500...per ticket!  We had spent only $700-ish per one-way ticket to begin with.  The kicker was that we had to travel on our original date in order to claim the refund.

At first, our instinct was to lose the refund, pay the change fees (plus the difference in fare when we ended up re-booking tickets, which would probably be last minute and would likely cost thousands) and just wait it out in Utah until we got Emily's visa.  We prayed earnestly and consulted with our family members.  We also considered having me stay with Emily, but I couldn't bear to think of Steve traveling alone with the other kids (especially toddler twins).  Finally, the day before departure, we decided to leave Emily with kind and willing family members, convinced that the visa would come any day.  I would help get the family settled in NZ and would fly back in a week or so to bring Emily.

Departure day was horrible.  I hardly slept the night before and was a sobbing mess.  I hated leaving Emily.  I was so mad at INZ.  I felt defensive of Emily and couldn't believe we were in this difficult situation because of her Down Syndrome!  It was ludicrous.  We tearfully departed, leaving Emily with Steve's sister Shannon who would be staying at the house for a few weeks, and embarked on our long journey.  I'm grateful to my Dad and Stepmom Marylin for taking us (and our embarrassingly gigantic mound of baggage) to the airport.  That black cart behind us was completely filled to the top!

The flight to NZ went pretty well.  We first flew to LA and had a 4-hour layover, then flew all night to Auckland.  The twins both threw up just one hour before landing!  We could have done without that little bump, but all things considered, our 20-hour journey went fairly smoothly.  We landed at 6am.  After chasing the fussy twins around the airport while we collected our baggage mountain and exchanged some money, we finally boarded a shuttle van and were transported to our hotel in downtown Auckland.  We felt relieved to be in NZ but felt totally exhausted.

Steve logged on with the hotel wifi to search for cars for sale.  We needed a car/van ASAP.  As soon as we opened our email, we were devastated to have a message from INZ saying that they needed additional information about Emily in order to continue processing the visa...an evaluation from an educational psychologist, and reading and math tests.  We could hardly believe that this information had come on the same day we arrived in NZ without Emily.  We thought of how long it had taken since the last "extra" request, and immediately worried that this new request would take weeks or even months to process.  To say that the wind was completely taken out of our sails would be an understatement!  We all cried (and cursed), but there wasn't anything for us to do but to start emailing everyone on our "team" asking for advice.

We had brought with us Emily's most recent progress reports from school, and knew that they would be more detailed and specific than anything a stranger (educational psychologist) would be able to achieve from an evaluation.  We would submit those reports and hoped they would be sufficient.  Unfortunately, it was already Friday in NZ and we wouldn't be able to meet with anyone at INZ until Monday.

We rented a van, and after a little sight-seeing in Auckland, Hamilton and Taupo (posts on those to follow), we arrived in Palmerston North on Sunday evening.  It was exciting to see all of the places we had researched online for months, but a little sad, too, since we weren't sure we'd actually be staying.  It was especially tender to see our rental home.  We peeked in the windows and walked around the yard, and Steve and I kept looking at each other with "Gosh Dang It" frowns on our faces.

First thing Monday morning we met up with Christine.  She hugged me and I cried.  She looked me in the eye and said, "We're going to get this sorted out."  I hoped she was right!!  After submitting Emily's paperwork, Christine convinced us to take our things to our rental home, since the first month's rent had already been submitted by the hospital, and to save us from more hotel costs.  We were thrilled with the home!  (More on that later, too) We were all grateful for a softer (& larger) place to land while we waited for whatever was next.

On Wednesday, Steve was invited to attend a meeting with hospital administration regarding our situation.  Christine had drafted a three-page memo detailing the process we had been through, pointing out the potential costs for our family and the hospital if the visa processing were to take much longer.  The hospital CEO had a connection with an immigration employee (we actually think it was even a former employee), and he agreed to call that contact.  We were thrilled to hear that the contact had spoken with his contacts at INZ...he reported to the CEO that Emily's application would be given "priority" and that we should expect an answer by the following Monday.

Meanwhile, the waiting was very hard for all of us, but I think I was taking it harder than anyone.  I had detailed our saga on my Facebook page, and felt SO overwhelmed and grateful for the outpouring of support and prayers, but I also worried that people were judging me and the decision we had made to leave Emily.  It was a hard several days, and poor Steve had to talk me down from a ledge nearly every day when I would get this close --> <-- to booking a flight home.

Shannon and her kids watched Emily for the first week.  We were able to see them on FaceTime, and that was such a blessing.  Other family members stepped in to include Emily in some of the fun activities going on.  She seemed to be really happy and doing well.  Steve's brother Layne and his wife Jami willingly took over with Emily for the second week.  Again, the FaceTime sessions were much-anticipated!  Even though the novelty of her playing with cousins, swimming, going to movies, and generally getting spoiled probably began to fade some, Emily still seemed cheerful and happy.  I love this photo taken by Jami during one of the FaceTime visits.

Steve began work as scheduled (although the first few days were basically just orientation sessions).  Monday came and went, and we hadn't heard a single word from INZ, so we decided that by Wednesday night (2 weeks after our original departure) we would book tickets home if we hadn't received an answer.  That may seem hasty, but we were just so exhausted and frustrated with the entire situation.  This wasn't a traditional job change or military assignment...we came to NZ voluntarily, and never anticipated spending a single moment in the country without the whole family together.

On Tuesday evening, we received an email that Emily's visa had been approved!!  Just like that.  It turns out that the CEO connection ended up being one of those situations you hear about, where someone just "knew a guy."  Of course we were thrilled, but we also felt a little bit like we had been dumped by a longtime partner, only to have them come back the next day begging for us to take them back.  Does that make sense?  We were just a little fragile, but that wore off quickly as we began to make arrangements for me to fly home.  The hospital graciously offered to pay for my fare (above the regular stipend allotted for travel).  We will always be grateful for the many hospital and staffing employees who worked tirelessly to help make this happen for us, and also for our awesome family members who lovingly cared for Emily.

I flew back to Utah the very next afternoon.  Emily was at Dad and Marylin's house and was fast asleep when I arrived at 1am.  I snuggled up to her and whispered over and over how much I loved her, then fell asleep with her in my arms.  I awoke to find her staring into my eyes and stroking my face.  It was a sweet reunion.  Over the next few days, she kept saying, "Mommy, we back gether again!"

Steve and the kids stayed busy in NZ getting officially "settled"-- visits to all the new schools, really unpacking all the bags, rearranging furniture, purchasing several needed items.  The time in Utah for me went quickly, and I enjoyed visiting again with our amazing families, if only for a few days.  In what seemed like a blink, Emily and I were on our way back to New Zealand...together!!  I love this pic of us (Emily holding her passport open to show her visa), taken the day before flying back.

I had really anticipated that the flight home would be a breeze...lots of sleeping and movie watching.  Unfortunately, Emily didn't take too well to air travel, and I spent much of the long flight holding a baggie to her chin and taking her to the potty over and over.  It was kind of miserable for me, but worse for poor Emmy.  I felt so bad that she felt so sick.  By the time we reached Auckland, though, she perked up for our last flight to Palmy, and cheerfully greeted our waiting family at the airport!  We made a bit of a scene and it was beautiful.

Emily's Homecoming! from Mindy Caldwell on Vimeo.

Going home was exciting, and watching the older kids give Emily a tour of the house was priceless.  Rachel had baked a cake, and Julia decorated...they are so thoughtful.

Phew!  It's such a relief to know that we can FINALLY begin this adventure properly.  We'll probably never know just how many people prayed for us throughout this ordeal...we know that sometimes our prayers aren't answered in the way we hope, but we're grateful that this time, they were.  :)  Let's get this party started!